•11:23 PM
I get asked, "Are you okay?" by quite a few people everyday. It may be due to the crazy t-shirts I wear, or it could be due to the fact that I am constantly on the hunt for delicious unicorn brains. I eat people brains too, but unicorn brains are second only to Cyclops eye in terms of a delicate finish on the palate. Simply delicious fare for a discriminating psychopath.
Quit screaming, you silly goose. I don't eat normal brains. I only eat special brains. I've learned as much as I can from eating smart brains, so it takes quite a bit to make me want to bother with a normal person's brain. Once you eat Einstein's brain, all the others taste pretty bland.
I stay up way too late at night on my typical unicorn-hunt evenings. When I get up in the morning, I really feel like I'm a real zombie and not just pretending to be one. My joints are stiff, my eyes are swimming, and my pulse is way too low. If I didn't score a good unicorn brain, or at least a horn, the night before then I'm not worth very much the next day. I hate doing it, but a human brain comes in handy when I feel that bad.
My unicorn brain-hunt would go much smoother if I could just get them away from those idiot werewolves they've been hanging around with. I am paranoid those flea-bags are going to infect me with their wolf-disease, so I can't get too close. There's nothing more disheartening than seeing a werewolf ride around a unicorn all night. How am I supposed to get my unicorn brains like that?
It doesn't take much skill to be crazy, you know. You probably already are and don't even know it yet. I'm one of the lucky ones because I've known I was crazy since the first time someone told me, "You so crazy." I AM so crazy. I ate her brain to prove it. I think it gives my prey a fighting chance if I just go ahead and wear my crazy t-shirts. If they think it's just supposed to be a joke, then that's their fault. I'm as mad as a hatter and I have the brains and crazy t-shirts to prove it.
Quit screaming, you silly goose. I don't eat normal brains. I only eat special brains. I've learned as much as I can from eating smart brains, so it takes quite a bit to make me want to bother with a normal person's brain. Once you eat Einstein's brain, all the others taste pretty bland.
I stay up way too late at night on my typical unicorn-hunt evenings. When I get up in the morning, I really feel like I'm a real zombie and not just pretending to be one. My joints are stiff, my eyes are swimming, and my pulse is way too low. If I didn't score a good unicorn brain, or at least a horn, the night before then I'm not worth very much the next day. I hate doing it, but a human brain comes in handy when I feel that bad.
My unicorn brain-hunt would go much smoother if I could just get them away from those idiot werewolves they've been hanging around with. I am paranoid those flea-bags are going to infect me with their wolf-disease, so I can't get too close. There's nothing more disheartening than seeing a werewolf ride around a unicorn all night. How am I supposed to get my unicorn brains like that?
It doesn't take much skill to be crazy, you know. You probably already are and don't even know it yet. I'm one of the lucky ones because I've known I was crazy since the first time someone told me, "You so crazy." I AM so crazy. I ate her brain to prove it. I think it gives my prey a fighting chance if I just go ahead and wear my crazy t-shirts. If they think it's just supposed to be a joke, then that's their fault. I'm as mad as a hatter and I have the brains and crazy t-shirts to prove it.
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