Last week I was shuffling down the street, trying my best to beat a hangover that was holding on for dear life. It was two in the afternoon, yet the cobwebs in my mind were refusing their grip on my sanity. Which is just as well, because what happened next surely destroyed plenty of my neural connections. I passed by this bookstore, and noticed this guy inside beckoning me to come in. Naturally, I complied.

I noticed that he was surrounded by gorgeous women, and he was putting on some sort of magic show. When I walked in, he was doing simple card tricks, and asking people to choose cards, and making them appear in random places. Normal stuff that you learn the first couple days in magic school.

After that he seemed to tap into the dark forces of evil. He used some kind of black magic to reach into their minds, and pull out information. Then he would go outside, and stop a random person on the street, and put them into some kind of hypnotic trance. Then under the hypnotic trance, they would tell everybody the secrets that this magician had psychically extracted from the first guy. Most people were shocked beyond expression.

After that, he settled back down into doing regular illusion type magic. Sleight of hand tricks, making stuff vanish, and they reappear in other places. One trick he did that I'm still trying to figure out is that he made everybody's drink vanish. He would tell somebody to pick up their drink, and as soon as they put the glass other their mouths, the contents would be gone. He did this at least three different times with three different people.

I decided to get out of there before he did something that permanently affected my grip on reality. But just as I was leaving, I heard him shouting at me with a desperation that seemed to be coming to a shocking climax.

You must study the dark arts! You must explore magic tricks revealed and expose the secrets to all who wish to learn! It is up to you! Of course, I ran away as fast as I could, never to return to that strange place ever again.